Dear December | The 3rd to 12th

Dear December,

Hi. I know I am I can’t just disappear for 10 days and then come back and say hi. But hey, hi. I missed you. No, I was not ignoring you. I was not in a self-destruction mode. Well, not entirely. I was just too caught up in everything that I couldn’t find the peace (and piece)of mind I need to talk to you. But, I am here now, so, let’s catch up?

I’ll be honest and tell you that I do not remember all the things I did in these 10 days and so I won’t be able to give you an hour by hour outline but I can tell you that these were the most productive days of the year.

Mostly, I was busy with Its Hemp. Would you believe it? I came up with the idea of hosting a nation-wide Secret Santa to bring people together and with a little help from Srijan (obviously), we were able to pull it off! It’s still going on because it is intended for the new year but it’s going pretty steady and I am proud of it.

Other than that, there was a little bit of work here, a little bit there but another thing that made these days the most productive was that I started chanting again. Yep, you read that right. So, on a random day, I got this lightning bolt of a realization of how much I truly missed being able to chant and converse with my BSG family. So I sat down and started chanting. Just like that. And before I knew it, I had chanted for an hour.

And then, Aanchal (bless her soul) called me out of the blue to invite me to a meeting. I went and it was the best fucking decision. Since last week, my practice has been going on steady. I’ve been chanting for 2 hours a day and I also did a 3:20 on Sunday. I think its primarily because of that that I have finally found time to talk to you.

The introvert in me wants to tell you, very proudly, that I have been socializing a little (we’ll focus on feeling guilty about that later) and I have made 3 new friends whom I am truly beginning to cherish. So, yeah, that. ❤

Other than that, life has been pretty good. My unexpected and inexplicable mood swings continue to come and go but I am so okay with them that I don’t even care anymore.

I can catch up on today!

The 12th

Morning

Today began late! I woke up from bhaiya’s call at 7:30 and then just ran down the stairs. But by 8:30, everything was restored to normal and I finally had my morning cup of chai. I chanted for an hour and then left for office. You were so unexpectedly cold today, by the way. Thanks.

Afternoon

Pretty busy day at work. I was a little blah when I sat down to work but it just got okay then so I shrugged it off. Then, we had butter chicken for lunch (so much for thinking of detoxifying my body) but hey! I had a guava before that so that’s cool. Right?

Anyway, I came home at 4 because this week its my turn to dog-sit Ram Dayal from 4:30 to 7:00.

It is 6:49 pm as I write this to you with Ram Dayal napping in my lap. And I don’t really have a musing of the day, or 10 days, but just that in these 10 days, I have been at peace. I did go into a self-destruction mode on Monday and Tuesday but I’m okay. I’ve got this. ❤

See you when I see you, December,

Love, and lots of it,
Apurva

Dear December | The 1st | Surprise!

Dear December,

This is as surprising to me as it is to you. But, here I am. Hi. How have you been? Cold? I know. I am welcoming you this year with a little less enthusiasm but I am glad to be in a position to welcome you at all.

I am not quite sure about the conversations that I will have with you this time around. I find myself utterly drained–of energy, of emotion, of hope. But, trying is the key. So, try I shall.

Continue reading “Dear December | The 1st | Surprise!”

DEAR DECEMBER | THE 31ST | FAIRLY-WELL FAREWELL.

Dear December,

If Linguists play with language, it doesn’t count as language erosion, does it? Should I go to the doctor or do you think my 2-year-old gym injury will heal itself? Can I go two months without buying another book? Have I opted for the right courses this semester? What if I don’t get to eat rasmalai before I leave home?

Oh, that reminds me, you’re leaving today! I am so excited! Don’t worry, I come prepared with everything you ask of. I know the drill. But before that, I have my own drill to do. Shall we?
Continue reading “DEAR DECEMBER | THE 31ST | FAIRLY-WELL FAREWELL.”

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